Random Acts Of Kindness

Next week at school is random acts of kindness week. When I noted it on the school calendar, it got me to thinking about a lot about kids and their ability to care about each other. Sometimes it just seems so natural. Like when a classmate falls and gets hurt at school and the group rushes to help. It also made me think about many unkind things that I see kids do to one another. On one of the morning shows this morning there was a segment about bullies and how to handle if your child is having issues with a bully or if your child has bully tendencies. All of this has really has me thinking about the future of our children and the world as well and our role as the adults in their lives. I read somewhere where the Dalai Lama said, if we could teach all of our kids in the world to meditate/think for an hour a day about what it means to be compassionate or kind, we could as a human race lay down all our weapons in the future. I know I may not have the quote verbatim. This really stuck with me.

Webster’s dictionary defines kindness as:

Kindness is the act or the state of being kind and marked by charitable behavior, marked by mild disposition, pleasantness, tenderness and concern for others.

I agree with this but I have have seen kids with less than a mild disposition still show acts of compassion when seeing a friend in need. This really gives me hope.

We see so many kids these days doing wonderful things and thinking of others when it hits the news on television. We also see things on the news when kids are hurting each other as well. Right now, I want to look at that which is inside of heart of a child to care like Ryan Hreljac, who learned of the great need for clean and safe water in developing countries. At age seven, Ryan's first well was built in 1999 at Angolo Primary School in a Northern Ugandan village. Since Ryan started this foundation, this has encouraged so many other kids to take action and do something good for others like the kids at the Wellesley Middle school in MA. Those kids decided to do a fund raiser and they started adding to the Ryan’s Well foundation with concerts and such in the community. That is so fantastic. I heard years ago, about the little girl who started getting family and neighbors to gather blankets for the homeless after driving through town on a cold afternoon with her mom and seeing homeless people on the street and thought they must be cold. That blanket foundation grew and the whole community was reminded by the heart string tugs of a little girl who cared about folks she didn't know. The community was reminded by this one little girl of the need of the homeless who were living amoung them in the cold. There were so many blankets, coats and food collected that year in that community for those who were in need. Bless this little child's heart. Her act of caring did so much to help.

All this makes me stop and try to look through the eyes of these children to see what they see and go a step further and look into my heart. As their hearts are touched to feel the compassion that they feel that draws them to respond, I too want to be reminded and awake to the needs of others just as children are. We all could stand to take some time to not let that which might seem hard to look at when there is so much need but to really see and to touch in to that part of ourselves where natural goodness resides in each of us and care about other living beings as much as we care about ourselves. Which brings me to questioning, how it seems that some children really seem to relate to what we may call “thoughtful” or “caring” while other kids don’t seem to display those feelings or take caring action and why. When we as adults think they should or might we might be confused why some kids seem disconnected to such a precious part of themselves that is pure goodness. I think it might be because, we as adults should be a better example more often. When their hearts are touched by the concern and need of another and display a loving act and feel called upon to do something, they need direction in how to respond. Are we as adults, when we are running through our busy days forgetting to care about others by cutting folks off in traffic or rushing ahead of someone in line at the store sending messages to our kids that says it is OK to override those feelings when we are busy and not paying attention to the needs of others?

Well, I do believe there is a call for us as adults to set better examples of caring for others for our children to witness. It is not enough just to love them, meet their needs but we need to wake up and help them to find their natural ability to care for other living beings and then act upon it and feel OK and good in doing so. Maybe you are like I, taught humility that those things which we do for others, goes unspoken. Which I do understand that we should not be spending time pointing out all we might do from a charitable heart to others but it might be a good idea to share some of those actions with your children and grandchildren. Such as, if you make a monthly contribution to a local charity or cause that when your writing out the check you sit your child down and tell them what you are doing and why your heart lead you to do that monthly. Maybe even ask your child at that point, would they too like to help and they could save allowances or donate toys. Or when you help some one at the grocery store let another go before you or put their things in their car and put their cart away for them. If your child is with you and sees this there is no need to explain. They will understand. Spend a little time looking for chances to help others and if you happen to be with a child, it's a great way to show them what compassion looks like.

I started thinking about what I could do to help my grand kids grow and feel more open about expressing their acts of compassion for others. I must admit I had not given it a lot of thought about it before. I have moved through my days and I do try and think of others but I think I am a lot like we all might be, just busy and don’t think a lot about messages I am sending to my grand kids. How can we ever have world peace if we can’t show love and compassion and a helping nature to those we love and strangers alike? If we can’t even pass on some change to a person digging through their pockets at a pay phone, how can we continue to pass up great chances to teach? How can we ever have world peace if we can't remember to teach our children to care through some of the opportunities to help another throughout our day?

I was ask to come in to help with a project at school on Friday. Our teacher is going to be out and I am sure I was ask because I have spent a lot of time with the kids. New subs get put through the ringer by those kindergartners. I thought it might be a nice chance to maybe help the kids make a kindness chart. I had been already giving thought to this for using here when I see one of the kids just do something nice for another family member without being ask and pointing out what a nice thing, adding a heart to their kindness chart. When the chart is full, then it is time for someone to do something very nice for them. Even if it seems like a reward system, if the chart is large enough it still will allow for a good amount of time for some good patterned behavior to happen and be recognized; however, I know there is no better replacement for a child to learn and act on kindness than with good examples shown to them. Which makes me think about finding some summer volunteer programs that I could do with my gal. We both would have so much to gain from it.

I guess what I am trying to say is, lets just find ways daily to be kind to others. Kindness spreads and kids, they will be forever changed by the adults in their lives that are kind just as kids with unkind adults in their lives are too changed.

What are your thoughts? If you have good suggestions on how to help kids connect and express kindness or even stories of kind acts done by a child, please share them here. I would love to hear them.

Well, this is one Mamaw that has some work to do…

Y’all take care and blessings and hugs to all!